Update: My grandma said talking about her funeral plans was 'tempting fate' and made me stop
She told me, 'We don't speak of death in this house until it's at the door,' so now I just keep a private note on my phone with her wishes for hymns and who gets her china, because how are you supposed to plan for something you can't even mention?
Keep that note safe and add to it when you can. I started a shared folder with my sister for our parents, just a basic document with account numbers and who to call. It feels less like planning a funeral and more like leaving a map.
Honestly, that rule sounds superstitious and unhelpful. It makes the whole thing harder for everyone left behind. My family used to be like that and it caused so many fights after my grandpa passed. Having a plan is just being kind to the people who will grieve you.