Vent: Everyone thinks it's fine to ask about my grandma's death at dinner

I moved to Japan for a year to teach English (totally different from my middle school gig back home, I know). At a family-style dinner with my host family and their neighbors, someone casually asked how my grandmother passed away. In my head I'm like, uh, that's a dinner table question here? Turns out, in Japan, death is a normal topic anytime, but in my American family we absolutely do not bring up grandma's cancer over okonomiyaki. Has anyone else had a cultural moment where something totally normal to you was a huge taboo somewhere else?

2 comments

2 Comments

beth_hart682d agoMost Upvoted

Honestly, the grandma thing is wild but it's just part of a bigger pattern where every culture has these invisible rules about what's okay to say and when. Tbh it's like we're all just guessing what's rude half the time and hoping nobody gets offended.

hannaht292d ago

Totally agree @beth_hart68, its like everyone walks around scared they're gonna accidentally break some cultural rule they didn't even know existed. Last week I told a friend her new haircut was "interesting" and she took it as an insult, turns out that word is apparently shady now. Its honestly exhausting trying to keep track of all these unspoken etiquette shifts.